3 Steps to Transform Your “Longings” Into Creating the Life you Long For

Today we are going to look at 3 steps we can take to transform our "longings" into creating the life we long for. Let's jump in with this story!

LOOOOOONNNNNGING....

Lately, I have been dancing around and with this idea of "Longing".

Longing for love, for intimacy.  Longing to be ready for partnership.

Longing for my business to be producing "aha" moments in others - and financial abundance in me.

Longing to be in both Cali and Nashville at once.

Longing to have the BIG happy family the little girl in me always dreamed of in my new home here in TN.

As I danced with these longings in me over the last few weeks ~ I felt its magnetic presence in me, imagining it drawing to me that which I craved.

That is until a dear friend STOPPED ME DEAD IN MY TRACKS.

"Do you really want to magnetize longing into your life?"

"O Sh*t! F&*K no...," I replied (okay truth be told it took me a bit to get there....geez).

The truth is ~ we attract what we are feeling.  So if I am feeling longing - I am not going to get anything but MORE LONGING in my life.

Ewww.  That is NOT what I want.

What I want are the results of what I am longing for. NOT the longing itself.

More than that - what I truly want beneath the surface of the "objects" of my longing is to feel the peace, joy and orgasmic (yes, I just said that 😜) ecstatic bliss that "object" would bring me.  To feel seen, heard, met, understood.  To feel safe, complete and satisfied.

SO, IS LONGING OKAY TO FEEL?

As a somatic (meaning "of the body") practitioner - I am committed to being present in every moment with myself, allowing the feelings within to be e-moted.  To be energy in motion..."e-motion".

With THAT being said, I live my life from this premise:  no emotion I might ever feel is right nor wrong.  It simply is there to feel.

So yes, longing is ABSOLUTELY okay to feel.  They are simply energy moving through you.

Believing this is true ~ and knowing that I don't want to attract more "longing"...how do I move forward with this feeling of "longing" without attracting more of it?

WORKING WITH OUR BIG EMOTIONS TO CREATE WHAT WE TRULY WANT

So here is what came to me as I sat with my emotions and the truth of what I want to attract.

  1. Is this emotion helpful for me right now, in this moment?  If so, why?  
    • Usually the "why" is because my longing is pointing me towards a RESULT I want in my life.
    • Instead of pushing, resisting or rushing OUT of the "longing", I sit with it for a bit.  Allowing it to BE A GUIDE for me as to the "why - what am I really longing for?  What is underneath the surface of this longing"
    • Perhaps I dance, or move through space with my physical body, asking myself where is this longing in my body and how does it want to move?  What story is it telling me?
    • Often times the surface longing of, for example, "an intimate relationship" - is really a deeper thang.  Such as to be seen, heard, felt on a soul level.  Or to feel safe to be seen, heard, felt.  I can only know the "deeper thang" if I sit in the longing for a while and feel into identifying the REAL RESULT.
    • Once I can identify the wanted RESULT, I move on to # 2.
  2. What FEELING does having the RESULT give me?
    • Once I know what the result is I am longing for, I will journal or drop into a visualization (i.e. meditative state) and tap into what feeling that result would give me.
    • Once I know the feeling of the result, I know what that feels like in my body (again the emotion, or energy in motion).  Since energy is the "language" of the Universe - I now take that feeling into #3.
  3. REFOCUS MY ENERGY on the FEELING BEHIND THE RESULT.
    • Now I can dance, journal or meditate on this refocused energy every time I feel the emotion of "longing" coming up in me in regards to whatever I am "longing" for.
  4. Wash, Rinse & Repeat as needed.

If this resonates with you in any way, shape or form - leave me a comment and share with your friends!

Of course, I am always here to help guide you through this process as well - if you want that support.

Lastly - if you live in the Greater Nashville area - come join us at Ecstatic Dance Nashville this Friday.  Here - you can move into this practice of working with and transforming your "longing" or any emotions you might have!

 

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